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A Student's Life 17

We're leaving together... But still it's farewell... And maybe we'll come back... To earth who can tell...?

As this is my last ever contribution to LeNurb, I thought I'd go out in typical brash 80's style with a bit of classic Swedish rock. I was actually considering changing ‘earth' to ‘Brunel' but I thought maybe that might be pushing it a bit. As it goes, failing a miracle I'm really not coming back to Brunel. You'll be surprised to learn I am actually about to head out into the scary world of work, armed only with my wits and a bachelor's degree in English. So maybe that's just my wits then...

Joking aside, I've got to say I've really enjoyed my time here at Brunel. So ok, maybe some things here could be better, but then, the whole university experience has always only ever been about what you make of it. Hopefully at least one of you out there has taken some joy out of reading my column, and if I've made at least one person laugh, then I consider that a job well done. In fairness, living with the people I do, if I didn't laugh sometimes, I think I'd cry.

Take David for example. Our dear beloved oft-absent housemate David - a.k.a. ‘Eduardo' the touchy-feely drunk man - decided only the other day that he was going to attack me outside the library. Obviously David being David, his brain neglected to take into account the large cup of coffee in my hand as he decided to sneak up on me and grab me in a massive bear hug, lifting me into the air. I don't think I need describe my reaction as my mocha went everywhere, mostly over me, but I'd like to take this opportunity to apologise to the poor Student Centre staff who had to endure my torrent of abuse hurled at David, whose sole excuse was ‘Well I didn't think you bought coffee on Tuesdays'. I'll let that one sink in with you readers: ‘I didn't think you bought coffee on Tuesdays'. The way this man's brain works sometimes really does baffle me.

His latest ‘David-ism' is saying, ‘I'm usually really good at X' whenever he does something silly, stupid and/or dangerous. A good example would be the recent rat incident, in which David ‘Eduardo' Snoddy was entrusted with the care of his ex-girlfriend's pet rats while she went away for a long weekend up north. Why someone who has known David for as long as Amy has, would trust David with the care of living creatures is perhaps the first question any regular reader of this column would probably ask. When Tom and I realised that David had been away for the entire weekend he was supposed to look after said rats, we began to worry. Only fear of Eduardo's wrath kept us from revealing to the retuning ex-girlfriend that the rats had probably been fighting because they were hungry. Needless to say, David has spent the last two weeks trying to explain how four days away was actually one, and how he had conveniently arranged for someone to check on them. I tell you now readers, none of us are buying it.

Some of you may well think I'm being a tad harsh on poor David in this, my final article. What you all perhaps don't realise, is the amount of material I leave out. That of course, and the fact I thought I'd be nice to Tom for a while as he's still smarting after the key-in-toaster revelation of a few months back. 

It's quite sad really, to think that university is coming to an end, and with it, the Bellclose Road family. And we really have turned into something of a dysfunctional family these past two years. David is the mum, Tom is the spoilt five-year-old, and well apparently, I'm the granddad. In actual fact I'd say perhaps a better comparison would be the cast and characters of Sesame Street. Somewhat disturbingly, David and I really have turned into an Ernie and Bert-type couple of late, with semi-regular breakfasts of porridge and tea together in the mornings, followed by an episode of the Hoobs.

And what of Tom, what character would he be? Well after long and very serious consideration, I've come to the conclusion that he's that annoying blue bird thing. Let's just say it's not because he's blue...

So here it is...

My last ever LeNurb

... the end of an era

And so this is it, my final article for LeNurb. Looking at my website content editor I have seventeen 'A Student's Life' articles now, all but one published. This isn't of course counting the few 'Extra' editions I wrote for the summer and winter periods. It's certainly been a long and interesting journey. Hopefully next academic year when I get myself settled down, I might try and find a home for a new series of humorous articles. Now if only I could come up with a title...

Before I go I'd just like to say a few thank-yous to the various kind people who have featured in and/or commented on my work. If I made at least one person laugh, then I guess that's a job well done.

First of all, a big thank you to David, who was my initial inspiration for these articles in the first place, and has been a constant source of humorous material over the past three years. Thanks also to Tom and Barry, as David's co-stars and partners-in-crime. Thank you to everyone who has contributed to LeNurb over the past three years, and special thanks to Gaz (Marksman), for his articles, humour, and most importantly, his sanity. Thank you everyone.

MJR


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